Pumpkins, clocks and stuff.

Halloween approaches. Anybody heard my voice on Bob and Tom lately? They usually play some old CD versions of my stuff I did for them in the studio about Halloween. Nice to know after 20 years or it still holds up. ;)

I wish I could remember my last 'trick or treat' night as a kid. I just can't and that is a shame.

I use to love the song 'Monster Mash' by Bobby Boris Pickett ...still do I guess. Looked it up on YouTube the other night.

Halloween...gateway to Thanksgiving and then the big Christmas shopping, dreaming, partying, you know the general angst filled season begins. Yikes -I think I will carve a pumpkin real slow today and stretch out Halloween as long as I can. Oh god I have to get candy!!!! You gotta have candy!!!! Oh boy, the holiday stress has already arrived I guess. ;)

Gotta turn back the clocks this weekend too. At least that's like an extra hour. Which of course you use up finding and turning all of your clocks back! No rest for the wicked. Wicked? Oh yeah Halloween. Have a fun one and keep it safe for the kids annnnd yourself. Look out for each other.

Have a nice day. :)

chill aka Uncle Hippie

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

Lovin it!

You know I wish sometimes I could tell people how much I love comedy. It has been part of my soul for decades...since the early memories of childhood to just today I have been writing and or performing comedy in some way or other. Hell I do it when alone. Comedy isn't just a 'face' I put on for people or save for the stage, I am in a constant flow of funny. I make myself laugh. I don't think I'm ever annoying with it, I seem to be in command of when, how and have appropriate behavior. Still I am eternally looking for the funny in all moments of life. They're not always there but I look nonetheless, I have to.

I have always wished the best for other comedy performers especially if they're for real. I see a lot of phonies out there and even then I may root for them in some way simply because for some reason or another these faux artists have the want to experience what real art feels like. Still honestly I am compelled to say there are too many 'cover comedians' allowed by bookers and club owners to thrive.

It's absurd to me that bookers would shoot themselves in the foot by sending out so many of these type of untalented non-representing acts....but it happens all the time and everybody looks the other way or makes excuses.

I can only imagine what a world of honestly real stand up performers would be like. All of them fighting for the art form and keeping it real by policing their own. I'd have to think that bookers would then be forced to book only quality acts and....well it's never gonna happen huh? Afraid not.

I do love the biz and process though and will pursue trying to make a positive difference- not from ego or any agenda crap- but just from the love of the game man loooove of the freakin game. lol

Have a nice day :)

Uncle Hippie aka chill

www.standupschool.com
www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis

I'm back!

Hey bros and sistas!

After a short hiatus to pitch a service here I am now back to write ramblings and rants again.

I am preparing to go to Kansas for a weekend of shows this week. (no Dorothy and Toto jokes please) Have been at this venue before and it's pretty ok. The hardest part of this gig is just the traveling. The shows are a piece of cake.

I have been caring for two little pooches this past week, actually three but two are under my direct responsibilty ;) Gracie and Lulu have been my constant companions as I go through the daily grind....let them out...let them in....feed them...give them treats....pet them, groom them...pay attention to them....yikes! Did I mention I also have a couple of cats to take care of? Oh yeah! So throw in litter box patrol too to the mix. :(

Ah all for a good cause and the sweet little things give back plenty in the way of entertainment. lol
Watching over my pets is much better than watching TV anyday! I think that would make a great reality show....men taking care of a house full of pets!!!

It's all good karma I guess OM!

Take care of pets & yourselves my friends. And have a nice day! :)

Uncle Hippie...chill.

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

Chance to Learn Stand up comedy and writing. Special offer.

Heads up my funny friends new and old! If you're a comedian, comedy writer or just want to know more about writing humor/jokes for TV, cartoonists, radio and stand up act you might be interested in this offer.

I am moving more and more into the teaching/..coaching of comedy writers and standups through online methods. Many already know about my standup coaching videos online and have taken advantage of that. I have found this to be very effective in helping new and experienced people gain valuable knowledge and assistance in their careers and so now I want to do even more.
Bottom line is this: An experiment in teaching of performing and writing.
As of today I am offering (and you heard it here first) my private coaching service for 4 weeks for $199. That's it. One payment of $199 will get you my personal private online coaching on stand up and comedy writing etc for 4 weeks.

The going rate for private pro coaching is any where around $799 minimum and up to thousands of dollars for 4 to 6 weeks. However if you contact me within this week I am selecting no more than 5 people to receive this special private coaching deal.

The process willl consist of at least 4 weeks of online help (exchange of emails and documents etc) to assist with expansion of ideas, writing, joke refinement-punchup, act structure, as well as audio/video critiquing. During this of course I will be willing to do Q&A to answer any of your questions about how to get started in a professional writing career and or further your stand up experience.

Video conferencing also offered.

Payment plan: I offer Paypal and of course will accept check and or money order.

Again I'm sorry but only the first 5 people confirming with me will get this deal right now. Let me hear from you via email, twitter DM or Myspace message. This is your chance to hire a pro writer and headlining comedian to focus on you, your writing and your act.

Thanks and have a nice day. Uncle Hippie -Chili Challis comedyink@aol.com - www.twitter.com/chilichallis1

Ps Have a writer in the family? I will consider offering this for a holiday gift as well. Can start training in January. Great for salesmen and women too. Funny sells and endears

Public Health Care sorta.

The medical field is all about the money isn't it? I recently went to a doctor's office and the first thing he examed was my wallet!

I know I have to get into better shape, I pulled a muscle the other day opening a bag of 'Dorito's'!

I've tried diets before...everything to be frank. 'Weight Watcher's' - 'Slimfast' - 'Poverty' - all of the really good ones and still I can be too heavy.

Everywhere they remind you of your health. Have you walked around a mall lately? In most malls today you can check your weight, your blood pressure, even your heart rate. I was in a mall recently and I didn't buy a thing but I got a complete physical. And I think I'm pregnant I'm not sure if I read this one machine correctly.

I tried this Atkins diet once where you could eat all the meat and drink all the alcohol you wanted. I loved it. I lost over 20lbs in one year....and my driver's license for two!

Have a nice day! :)

Uncle Hippie chill

http://www.standupschool.com/
www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis

Later!

Gosh I hate doing things late. I hate writing my blog late or being late for a show or any kind of appointment. Have you ever known these people that are always late...they have absolutely zero problem with getting things done past the due date or arriving somewhere late as a robbed stage coach. I'm just not wired like that and I have no reason- it's just me. It's the way I work...maybe I'm wrong but I'll betcha more times than not I'll be on time to be wrong.

Funny how often you look at your watch when you're late. Man o man time soars when you're late. Whoever wrote 'time flies' when you're having fun' should have also said and 'when you're late too'!!!. You start to feel lessor or something. You imagine all kinds of things going wrong because you're late. There's never a proper excuse for being late either...nobody ever listens to your excuse...all they see is that FINALLY you're there and now you're mumbling something about traffic or a UFO or whatever- they just don't care.

Some things it's easier to be late for...lunch or dinner is one thing...a show or theater date ouch- dead man!

So I'm late with the blog and it's bad and I'm sorry. It was traffic and a UFO or something. At least cell phones have made it easier to report in that you are going to be late...and of course harder to hide when you are running late. I loathe the "..you're late!"... phone call.

Well that's about it. I'm late with the blog and so the blog was about being late. I'm not above doing what's easy.

If you're late always arrive smiling!

Have a nice day. :)

your chill Uncle Hippie

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

Friday on the road.

It's Friday! tgif I guess. For me it means more work. I'm in Cleveland Oh area working a comedy club which means I will do two shows tonight 8 & 10pm. That's after early morning radio this past Thursday and today. Tomorrow I will do two more shows and even a morning comedy writing workshop at the club to help new guys and gals in the stand up biz.

I really like teaching/coaching and I'm really not exactly getting rich with it - many times it even ends up costing me money but I still love to do it and therefore that is the reason. The old saying "If you really want to know a subject teach it!" I profess to be true. I've learned a lot teaching comedy. I have learned that some new comics would rather not take a class and so continue to keep on making the same mistakes. I relate to that - I came up the hard way in stand up...it took me years to learn somethings that I can now deliver to a new student in a couple of hours of class time. I have gained a partial skill thanks to an inner eye for seeing talent and knowing where an act is going right or wrong. I can tell in an instant if a comedian is real or phony and usually help direct him/her to a new place where they can progress.

I completely understand that some new acts aren't on a fast track and actually like the process of the open mic nights and would really rather subconciously or not want to stay there. It becomes not a way of advancing but more of a way of socializing. I suppose you seek your own comfort level.

Teaching comedy and act refinements is a unique challenge and I've been doing them since the 80's. I think after all this time of experimentation and study I've finally learned how to do it well. lol

Happy Friday my brothers and sistas!! Uncle Hippie is at work helping people laugh a little. It could be worse. Peace.

Have a nice day. :)

chill aka uncle hippie

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

Energy!

Energy drinks are taking over the world. When did we get so tired in this country? It use to be a bottle of water but now everybody has to show up at a meeting energy drink in their mitt. They come under every name out there...Red Bull, Red Thunder! Monster! -Amped - ZAP! POW! KAZONK! it sounds like Batman and Robin are fighting criminals again. It wasn't long ago that Monster supported truck shows and not something you drank.

Remember when the only energy drink was coffee? Juuuuust coffee??...you wanted to wake up or stay awake or needed a lift cramming for an exam...somebody always put on a pot of coffee. Not so much anymore. I think the pot of coffee is going out with the phone booth. Who puts on a cup of coffee anymore? Everything is microwavable, Starbucks, instant, now even Starbucks is coming up with an instant- jeeeez.... as Steven Wright joked "I put instant coffee in the microwave- I went back in time...!" And back in time is where you will have to go for a pot of coffee. Thank goodness for diners! A pot of the good stuff is still a staple. A strong black cup of diner coffee...hell yell!!!...take that Red Lightening Bull Hell Raising Monster Amped up- ZAP-O HEART BUSTER 1000 percent energy drink!!!!!

Diners coffee vs energy drinks....diners by 7! ;)

Drink up kids. Keep it as natural as you can and watch that caffeine for real. Use exercise to make your heart pump!

Have a nice energetic day. :)

Uncle Hippie chill

http://www.standupschool.com/
www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis

Do the work. The honest way to feeling good.

Making people laugh is not such a hard job, actually it's a wonderful cool groovy job. The satisfaction you feel on stage when a tidal wave of laughter rushes over is absolutely life giving. It's like you're plugged into a human electrical current that recharges you and everybody around you...the feeling is electrically awesome.

My wish is that everybody at least once in their lifetime would get an opportunity to experience the rush of performing stand up comedy. That's why I don't blame people for wanting to get into it and when they do- getting hooked on it...without a doubt the attention, the love, the sensation of adoration is addicting.

I really love to see it when my students get acquainted this mystical love in happening the first time they take the stage in a live audience show. It can be overwhelming...a rollercoster ride they can't wait to do again and I can't blame them.

That's why I take my comedy classes very seriously. I want my students to succeed and I want them to succeed in the correct way and so not to fool themselves. What does that mean?

It means being honest with themselves and doing the work. I demand they write their own bits from personal experiences and never NEVER take somebody else's material. Don't be a mimic of a famous or more creative comedian....doing that will set their developement back years. Once you savor the nector of thievery it is hard to lose the taste for it...so don't even start. I am quick in my dojo to let a student know if he's 'sampling' somebody else's jokes. It is forbidden.

When you think about it there is zero need for being a joke thief when the whole world is out there for you to write about...there is SO MANY defects and inconsistancies in everyday life to twist and turn and have fun with....why would anybody take a joke???! It's counter productive and it garnishes you a reputation that stays with you and retribution can follow you to the higher levels of the business (if you ever get that far).
Actually I feel sorry for dishonest comics (notice I don't call them comedians)...I know they want to experience what the big boys and girls feel but they just don't have it and should take their toys and go home. The best thing they could do is start over - do the work - come back and succeed on their own merit.

I think this is true of any business. Being honest and fair has not gone out of style has it? Is there any better feeling than getting that promotion and knowing it was bona fide??!

Always do the right thing kids it really is the class way....at least in the dojo class it is. ha! see what I did there??? lol

Have a nice day. :)

ur Uncle Hippie chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

Art?

What is art? I often call stand up an art form and comedians artists and have on a few occasions gotten an argument. I may remind those people that art is defined as a craft, a skill, creativity, expertise, ingenuity, cunning, obsession, etc etc etc on and on.

I believe that helping people laugh is an obsession of mine no doubt on and off the stage. Not that I am one of those dreadful comedians that is 'on' all the time. I find those artists annoying. I know they're just doing what they do but jeez save it for the show!

I think artists that use pictures have an advantage over comedians. The old saying 'a picture is worth a 1000 words' is apt for artists that draw, paint or use photography and film. The lowly comedian doesn't have that kind of time. We have to paint a picture and get a laugh using minimal words and expressions. There is no standing and appreciating our art form we have to something ready for consumption every 10 seconds or so. Phew!

Oscar Wilde said: "A work of art is the unique result of a unique temperament". I rest my case that attitude is a much needed part to the formula of a great spoken joke.

However this type of study and use of artful communication is not just for comedians anymore. The average person would be well off to take a comedy class or two (such as my stand up comedy dojo ..hint-hint lol) and learn how to shorten and clarify their thoughts as well as to how to use attitude and passion in speeches, pitches and everyday conversations.

The word is out on my class for this very reason and I have to believe this is why I get so many salespeople, teachers, policemen and others that are just there to experience the dojo, face a fear and learn to communicate using stand up comedy techniques that help them gain a perspective on their unique temperament.

Stand up is art. Effective communication is a unique result of getting in touch with your unique temperament and therefore an art form.

Go out and give somebody some passion and attitude! Take a comedy class somewhere.
Let art ring! ;)

Have a nice day. :)

ur Uncle Hippie chill

www.standupschool.com
www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis

Aren't we all sometimes?

Ever heard the old saying 'ignorance is no excuse'? Who is that for exactly? Are the ignorant helped by such a saying? If they are then are they so ignorant after all? Should we update the saying to 'totally unfounded ignorance is no excuse either'?!!

My guess is 'ignorance is no excuse' is just a way of warning 'don't use the old I didn't know crap'.

Of course I don't think it takes a genius comedy mind to factor in that the truly ignorant probably aren't going to be helped by such as saying because ...well, that's not how the ignorant roll.

The dictionary gives the definition of ignorant as somebody that is uncultivated, uncultured, unenlightened, uninformed, unread, (anybody else visualizing certain family members?!!) unschooled, untrained, unintellectual, unwitting....unon and unon and unon.

I wanna help some people I come in contact with once in a while so I'd like to go on record as declaring right here and now that being an 'imbecilic bird.brain is no excuse'!
... 'mindless moron is no excuse'! ... 'obtuse thick or oblivious' is no excuse;!!! Not even if you are
...'naively shallow- NO excuse' ok ok for now that's it...however I maintain the right to amend this 'no excuse law' to include the 'witless'.

I rest my ignoRANT. ;)

Have a nice day. :)

Uncle Hippie chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

What's funny about that?

What do you think is funny? You'd certainly think I'd know after having written and performed stand up for about 30 years as well as within that time frame written thousands of pop culture jokes for tv talk shows, cartoonists and a throng of other comedians in various situations from radio, film and such.

It's easy really, funny is anything that gets a laugh from the majority. Funny has to possess some kind of release from pain, confusion, misunderstanding, defect or inconsistency. Funny is articulate translation of being lost and taking a delight in gossiping or reporting back on it.

Funny is almost never shocking or anything that will make you cringe- that's a whole other release that may simulate funny but in close examination is not really. Shock laughs can be had but are never long lasting or memorable.

Funny should be something shared by all of us and reported on by a person of sympathy and attitude.

Surprise is definitely part of being funny...though there are degrees of surprise...it could be a quick or even drawn out reveal. If it's drawn out it must be compeling for the audience, something rich in character and or rarity of event.

Funny is the positive side of failing but yet continuing. Funny should draw the audience together. Too many new and unknowing comedians fragment their own audiences and don't even know it. Funny should be heartfelt and having a form/structure as to reach a part of everybody in spirit.

Funny should only be a ripple of tension then soothed.

You've probably guessed I could go on and on. Funny is life to me. It's not everything but it's right up there. Funny isn't it? ;)

Have a nice day.

yur Uncle Hippie chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

*A message to women. Men cannot be changed. We can be altered a bit to fit the occasion but never completely changed.

Enduring interruptions.

It's the age of interruptions I guess. People interrupt MTV acceptance speeches and even the President of the United States giving a speech to Congress. Being a stand up comedian I get interrupted all the time even if it's just by somebody enjoying my show. Who hasn't been interrupted these days? Interruptions are a fact of life. This blog is interrupting your day...except perhaps you allowed it by taking the time to deal with my interruption.

lol...I was just interrupted by my gal and a news story while I was drafting my interruption of your day. That's true. Jeez!

I guess it's not that we're interrupted it's how we deal with it. It's hard to factor in time for interruptions because you never know when they're going to happen...that's why they're called interruptions huh?

The dictionary says an interruption is 'an interference'. Not to be confused with an interception...that's a good thing in football unless of course it was your quarterback that was interrupted by an interception and so the offense's plan was interfered with.

I think that's why we have patience...thank goodness for patience...it helps us deal with all these interruptions, interferences and interceptions of our time and space and gives us a capacity to endure them. Viva la patience! Whoever invented it was right on and something tells me in the coming age we're gonna need a lot more of it.

Have a nice day. :)

Uncle Hippie chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1

www.myspace.com/chilichallis

www.standupschool.com

Another comedy dojo today!

Well it's come around again, the start of a brand new stand up comedy class or as I call it the comedy dojo. It all starts tonight in Ann Arbor, MI at the historic Comedy Showcase. I will have some shiny new faces along with some regulars all waiting for me to inspire and coach. In 5 weeks they will face the fire of a live audience with only their jokes/bits written from personal experiences and of course made up lies- lol. That's what's good about stand up- everything doesn't really have to be the total truth...but it does have to be funny.

I will go through setup/punchline formulas and coach them on attitude 'selling' of their material. They will learn to 'live it as they give it' as I always say and they will hear my dojo mantra...
'Do the work'! For gosh sakes 'Do the work'!

Most of these people will never be a working stand up comedian however the dojo training will be very valuable to them as they will learn to be funnier and have more command of their thoughts and ways. They will get to know themselves better than most people because I will ask them to look inside and around. Writing comedy material is a lot about looking for and investigating in consistencies and defects in the world and your own!

I look forward to it all always! Come join me sometime in a live class or seminar or join my online class at www.standupschool.com . You'll see what I mean about how much goes into performing of stand up.

Have a nice day.

Uncle Hippie chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis

Working it!

Some days you're simply too busy. Things slip and new priorities have to be set. I call it flow. Sometimes your flow much change, which of course is the nature of flow and you must make adjustments. This has been one of those days.

I am preparing to go to Chicago tomorrow and many things have come up. I am in the office working on my writing class that I will be conducting and my P.A. is making CD's for me to sell after the shows. They have to be burned into disks and then placed into packages ready to slipped out quickly and signed at point of purchase, of course everyone has to be checked for quality both in sound and prints.

Still things like preparing, packing, eating, making and taking calls, shopping etc etc-busy busy! It's all good but every minute is spoken for...show business is so glamorous ha!
If this was an hourly job I'd probably hate it but since it's my life's work I go at it like a kid at a candy store. That's the big difference- this is my business and it's hitting great strides lately on all fronts. I have to keep up and putting out extra effort is just the way it is, I'm delighted to do it.

As I'm writing this I just realized that I have new material I want to do and so I have to dig out the notes and cards and get that all ready. All I can say is I wish this for everybody! I wish everyone could have this kind of wonderful day. It's called being alive, active and immediate. May you all work this hard and if you do already - well then bless you and I hope you break a leg in all things.

I'll see you in Chicago if you can make it. I'll be at Walter Payton's Roundhouse Fri/Sat doing what I do and love. Sometimes it hard to believe I am enthroned to work like this. lol

Have a nice day.

Uncle Hippie chill

**I once worked at a company that made pink slips. It took me two years to realized I'd been fired.

www.standupschool.com
www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis

Why find yourself?

The study of stand up comedy can be hugely important in your life. It has for mine. Real comic artists probably are in touch with their personal makeup better than most psychologists are with theirs.

I say 'real comic artists' because today unfortunately there are far too many faux comedians. They exist because of unskilled bookers and unknowing/uncaring venue owner/mgrs and such. It's a long sad story but all too real and because of this the audience suffers and for the most part is driven away. Stand up regrettably is an art form that can be faked to a certain point. The audience can tell but by then it's too late - the false prophet is already on stage and doing his or her damage to the art. Far too many of these so called comedians take the stage full of selfishness and with zero responsibility towards the audience. They actually have the nerve to think that the show and show business is about them. I digress.

Studying comedy helps you realize that people laugh at pain -YOUR pain. How do you find out about that pain? You have to do a study of yourself - a truthful in depth study. You have to discover how YOU truly think, react and have reacted to turmoil in your life. Comedy is about looking for defects...in the world and your own...mostly YOUR OWN.
How do you do this? A great way to start is by asking yourself the tough questions and being honest with yourself.
A few of the questions for instance are:
What makes you angry? What confuses you? What has been your reaction to certain circumstances in your life? And of course the Why question. Comedy is a lot about Whys? Just like a child Why? Why? WHY!????

We had the right idea in the 60's when everybody was in search of themselves....comic artists have continued this quest and your Uncle Hippie certainly did. Thanks to the feelings safari I have been on for nearly 30 years I know myself pretty well but I still to this day examine, probe and research. I still ask the- whys???
Actually this type of self exploration is not only enlightening but fun and it tends to sooth while relieving you of some pain when you excavate your consciousness. I suppose any art form will inspire you to do this but for studying stand up- it's a must.

As a coach and teacher of stand up I've gotten so that I can tell in a couple of minutes of watching a comedian if they've done their homework in soul searching or if they are just repeating what they've seen work or simply being a mimic. I can only say there are far too many mimics now and the audiences can tell. Despite the shock laughs that a few get there is no connection and the audience, despite perhaps laughing, leaves empty and without that 'gift' that an artist is supposed to deliver. For me that is sad and unforgivable. For without that 'gift' the audiences dwindle and have no real motivation to return and that my friends is exactly what's happening to too many comedy venues lately.

So what can the average person do with this? Study yourself. Keep a diary. Write down your thoughts and always ALWAYS go behind your feelings. Ask the why question a lot and give yourself some honest answers. You'll find yourself and you'll be ok! lol

Just something to think about.

Have a nice day. :)

yur Uncle Hippie chill

www.standupschool.com
www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis

**I was a little different as a child. When we played hide n' go seek I concealed myself by changing my accent.

Chicago, workshops, and such.

This week I will be going to one of my favorite places- Chicago. I'll be performing at Walter Payton's Roundhouse. WPR as it's called in and around Aurora, Ill. is an amazing entertainment complex and has become a much favored stage for me to perform on and simply have fun. I have many friends in the windy city and of course many comedian pals that will stop in to see me. It's always kind of a mixture of work and party when I'm there and it's an honor when they take time out to watch you work on stage. When you can make comedians laugh you obviously have something extrordinary going on (at least that's what I tell myself) ;)

I will also as always hold a workshop for new and experienced comedians and writers. I admittedly love doing these types of instructional events because somewhere deep down inside the satisfaction of helping new artists feels good to me.

My schedule with writing projects, performing and classes has taken a real spike upward in intensity lately and that is by no means a bad thing. I invariably find the time to do it all and it works out to the benefit of everybody including myself.

I do make some money from teaching though I keep the cost per comic to ridiculously low prices. I understand that especially new people have little cash on hand these days to hire a pro writer and coach. Many know the deal I am giving them and of course a few (very few) don't get it. There's always a few fringe wannabe's that don't get anything -ever! That's just life:)

Pro writers and consultants (that would be me) get up to $200 per hour on studio deals yet sometimes I charge as little as forty bucks (that's correct JUST 40 measly bucks) for a workshop and even offer online help afterwards. So far I have only had one complaint most recently from a guy that just doesn't have a clue about show business or it's processes. He even had the nerve to complain to the venue I held the workshop in. He wrote to them that 'quote' .."...my follow up was horrible!"....LOL. I had to laugh as I do now when i think about it. So did the venue owners. This schmuck shot himself in the foot with the venue and me! Nice going huh? it's not everyday you can come close to ruining your career with one bs email ;)

Other than that I have a national rep that is growing in the best way possible, by the artists themselves promoting my workshops and acting as a street team to get people in. I appreciate that very much. It's nice to know there are people out there that understand this is practically missionary work by me.

I mean to make a difference in comedy from the ground up. I have taken on venues that short change comedians, club mgrs, bookers that run shoddy agencies and clubs and even other comedians that steal material and such. I will continue to do this forever. I have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

I do it because I love it. What other reason needs to be? Peace kids.

Have a nice day. :)

Uncle Hippie chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.standupschool.com
www.myspace.com/chilichallis

Greetings friend!!

I like salutations. Unless of course there's zero thinking and effortless emotion behind them which you can so clue in on can't you? When somebody asks 'how are you?' and makes no effort to look at you or put any feeling behind it- it might as well not even been said. It becomes more of a passing grumble.

Remember a greeting is suppose to greet! which means to make at ease and issue comfort...it's from the Latin word 'gree' which means to make happy. Ok I just made that up sorta but you get my point huh? People always fall for that 'it's from a Latin word' explanation all the time. Yep I'm the same person that makes up statistics on the spot to win arguments...nobody checks them out- so sue me. lol

Anyway I digress. Back to the point at hand...it's a fact that it's a powerful thing to simply put a little soul behind your salutations. 'Soulful salutations' I like that! ;)
People take notice and perk up around you when you greet them with just a little added zing, they definitely remember you. Gifting of positive energy is truly that easy to pass along...and yes I meant gifting as in the Latin word to give. ;)

I have an old friend that simply says "Howdy!" when he greets you. It's an uncomplicated greeting that is my friend to the core. He means it when he says it and what it really says using his voice and soul is "I'm delighted to see you". From his expressions and lips you can tell it's a warm greeting. Hmmmm, expressive salutations! I like that too!

Some salutations are getting a little old. "What's up?" is sooooo tired and 90's. PLEASE find anything and I do mean ANYTHING else but "What's up?".

How about this from the 60's -"What's shakin!? or What's going on!?". They've been used but still not as lame as "What's up?" Try "Bonjour or Buenos dias or Buenas noches" .
"Shalom" (that's bound to set you apart lol) How about going right at it with a heartful "Greetings!!!" That will get you a second look for sure.

Remember first impressions are important right? A salutation displays an attitude plus it makes a statement about you. I'd make it a warm statement if I were you.

Have a nice day :)

your Uncle Hippie chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

Positive attitude is life changing.

Attitude is everything- I sincerely believe that. The proper attitude is key in performing, all facets of communication and life itself. You have to possess attitude if not for anything but yourself. Being in touch with the in's and out's of your attitude is being in touch with YOU.

It's always been strange to me that you hear constantly while growing up that you should think for yourself and so when you do those same people then exclaim you have an attitude. No doubt they're referring to a bad attitude and to me that's a whole other thing. Of course you can have a bad attitude due to past experiences with pain and personal wounds I understand that, however there is such a thing as a great attitude, an understanding attitude, a nurturing attitude, a go get'em attitude etc etc

I've always been told I have a hippie attitude. I suppose that means laid back attitude and a sense of responsibility of things and people beyond my immediate world kind of attitude. I can live with that.

Wanna have fun? Pick out a certain day and tell yourself no matter what you are going to have a great attitude. Make it an affirmative Friday! or Great attitude Tuesday! or even motivated Monday!! lol
You will have very good results, I've done this many times in my life as a comedy writer and stand up comedian. Attitude has been my kick in the pants to get going in a successful way for many years and now is a way of life.

Attitude works wonders also in communication' - it's persuasive and catching. Ever talk to somebody that is full of great attitude...you can't fight them- they're convincing and find good in all circumstances...that's the kind of human energy that is very powerful.

Get all Dale Carnegie on somebody's ass today it will feel good! lol

Have a nice day...and weekend too!

peace,
Uncle Hippie chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
http://www.standupschool.com/

Social media ramblings.

Had somebody ask me recently if I had optimized my Google yet? I told them that was a private matter and we chuckled. I got to thinking that many things involved with computers, the web, internet etc sounds dirty or sexual but isn't. It's all of course from an attempt to attach action words to something that is relatively inactive. Remember when surfing meant just that? Taking your board down to the beach and actually getting into the water? Now it's simply moving a mouse around. Of course not an active living running around hard to catch mouse - nope, one that is attached to your pc and is just sitting there on your desk top awaiting your command.

Have you Tweeted today or Twittered? Sounds like a vibration of some sort, perhaps it is in a stretch...but not really. Don't even get me started on You Tubing.

Virus,Trojan virus, protection for your hard drive etc etc sounds like something that the Free Clinic or pharmacy should deal with huh?

No question there's a 1001 more I could go on and on.

Personally I like the secrecy terminology part of the web that uses passwords, private messages, protected sites, encrypted codes, firewalls, all to keep out the dreaded hackers, the enemy of every fun loving user and friend of the web. We must defend against the snoops and disrupters - death to the hackers. Do you think having a moat surrounding your computer is too much? I tried it once it's simply exhausting having to bring down the drawbridge every time you want to get to your laptop.
And those archers - forget it!

The web, internet, social media, whatever it is you have to appreciate it. Humans are in control and so that means as it always does that there will be the good and the bad, the true and the untruthful. Let the buyer beware.

20 years ago I never thought I'd be a blogger. As a matter of fact if somebody would have called me that my first instinct would have been that I was being insulted. Yet I am a blogger. There that felt better I'm out of the closet...yes I am a blogger!!!!! Freedom!!!

Come to think of it are there blog-ettes? Hmmm sounds like a band that would have opened for The Bangles. ;)

**Bought a cheap laptop once. Well they told me it was a laptop it turned out to be an Etch-a-Sketch. No wonder my emails took forever.

**Computers can be very frustrating. Unless of course you find just the right porn site.

Just a rant. Have a nice day.

Uncle Hippie

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilichallis
www.standupschool.com

How to tell a joke!

I've always had a passion for great quotes and jokes. Nothing I love better than a quick one-liner delivered with proper attitude and at the appropriate time. The late Henny Youngman was a master of said one-liners. Rodney Dangerfield another joke master who had that marvelous talent for machine guy type delivery of the funny.

One of their secrets for getting a laugh in their act was speed. The faster you get to a punch line the more likely it is to hit a home run with your audience's funny bone -end of story. Henny and Rodney could have given lessons in that technique, they were gunslingers of humor- nobody topped their speed to the punch line.

Another secret both possessed was 'timing'. To many timing is a big mystery, it is said you can't teach it and some people don't have a clue as to what it is or how to obtain it. I for one don't look at 'timing' as such a mysterious elusive thing. I have always believed that timing is nothing more than the proper passion and attitude demonstrated at the point where you deliver the punch line.
Passion and attitude dictate speed and fuel intensity which creates great timing.

So what does the average joke teller take from these secrets?
First never tell a long winded joke. Find short ones you can repeat.
Only tell jokes you love and have a passion for retelling. If you keep it short and have a 'feeling' for the joke you have a far better chance you're timing will be better and so the punch line will have pop!
Know your audience. Share jokes that are appropriate and are of interest to the people you're telling it to. Make sure everybody can laugh at it and they will. ;)

Spread the humor folks it's good for everybody but do your homework. There's a quote that says, "There is no better time than a joke being shared by somebody doing it justice!".

Have a nice day.

your chill and Uncle Hippie,


www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.myspace.com/chilihcallis
http://www.standupschool.com/

Sign Sign Everywhere a Sign

How many paths are there to life a zillion? Everybody seems to have an opinion as to which one is best or which one you're already on. I had people tell me when I was young to go the straight and narrow path. Walk the pathway on the side of righteousness etc.

Some were convinced I was on the way to self destruction....a highway to hell. So from that I quickly got that good gets a path and hell gets a highway huh? Kind of says how many are traveling the wrong way.

Then of course there are those that will tell you it isn't a path or a highway...life is a fast track. As in "Oh that guy is on a fast track to success or hell!" Apparently life's roads always lead to hell. Except of course for a path. No one ever seems to take a footpath to hell. It's always a track or highway or lane as in a 'fast lane' to hell.

Sometimes it's just the way you're heading that is incorrect in life- as in you're on the wrong side of the street or you're going in the wrong direction or that's the wrong route to take. That would of course be in the direction of hell!

Remember nobody ever ambles, strolls, meanders or saunters into hell. They're always on a fast lane or fast track or highway to it.

With all of this in mind conceivably we could have traffic signs for life. 'Do Not Enter' -'Wrong Way' -'Slow Down'- 'Dead End'- all take on whole other meanings if put in perspective to living huh?

Write some of your own it's a fun creative exercise. What other road signs do you see that could be erected in your life? 'Caution' would be a staple I would think. lol

**Saw a road sign that read: "Careful Deceptive Curve ahead".
How is a curve deceptive? It's really a straight-away?!

Have a nice day.

Uncle Hippie Chili

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
www.standupschool.com

I just try to get laughs.

You know I hope I never become one of those comedians that is too hip for the room. I hope I never do my show while talking to my opening act about what bits I should do as if the audience seated right there in front of me doesn't exist. I hope I never have to rely on the F word to make a joke funny. I witnessed such a show this weekend at a club I frequent when not performing. It was terrible.

When I do my stand up I try to not only deliver opportunites for hard laughs but maybe deliver a positive message or two as well. I've always been a performer that wants the audience to leave my show like they've been on a roller coaster ride and feel as if it was money well spent to see me. I have a sense of responsibilty towards an audience- sue me!

I don't get this anti-comedy thing going on in some comedians performance. Clever or witty is not good enough! Nobody gives a crap about your politics! It's not unhip or hack to simply get a laugh!

I am glad I have a stand up class to teach today. I can tell my students to go for jokes and real material. I will teach them that posturing and posing is NOT good enough. Watching a irresponsible and selfish comedian is all the motivation I need to help push for the better art.

Some comedy clubs wonder where the audience went. Well I saw some of them leave when jerko mr cool was on stage. It breaks my heart. I grow weary of seeing such all to common of displays in stand up these days. The inmates are fully in charge of the asylum.

No matter what job you do you should always take responsiblity to see it is done well and to the best of your ability. It's a simple creed.

I will be performing at the Comedy Showcase in Ann Arbor this weekend. I can't wait. The audience there is due a good show. www.aacomedy.com for details.

Have a nice day.

chill

www.standupschool.com www.twitter.com/chilichallis1

What time is it?

The music of 'The Doors' haunts me sometimes and I don't really know why. I think the recollection of that whole era of the 60's is kind of dark to me. It was a powerful world changing- consciousness raising decade for sure....nonetheless I remember what seemed to be a lot of overcast gray days. I guess that's why The Doors music is appropriate...it's not dance music that's for sure...it seems to capture a lamenting wail of that time...trance like.

Fashion wise the 60's detonated with color, you could do no wrong. Bellbottoms, 'Beatle-boots' or sandals, wide belts & lapels, paisley shirts. And man the hair! The afros, long and braided, sideburns, beards, we REALLY let our hair down then no doubt. Everything seemed far out and very groovy in the world of fashion.

Out of this came an experimentation with drugs and other types of mind altering meditations and even religions. Something wasn't right spiritually it seemed and we were out to fix it and change things.

We wanted to be any place but where we were....there had to be something else and we were going to find it and there we would find ourselves. Oh yeah that was huge in the 60's, everybody was out to find themselves. If only we would have had Facebook or Twitter or Myspace then....we would have found ourselves even sooner and saved years of time.
I conclude that it wasn't really about finding anything it was about as it always is -the search.

The 60's was about searching. Life is about searching I think. Searching for answers. Answers to what? Well whatever personal questions you have about your life. Ever meet somebody who thinks they have all the answers? Alarms should go off in your head, they do mine.

Here's one of the questions I have coming out of the 60's...how the heck does a mood ring work? Is it just heat sensitive or did it read your moods? And why did we think for a minute a Slinky would be entertaining? Fun for girls and boys?? Nah!! Ever see a girl with a Slinky? Doubt it...about as often as you saw a girl with a GI Joe probably. Slinkys was guy stuff.

Enough about the 60's...I'm gonna go put on the "Hair" album. Yes ALBUM! A big round plastic thing that a needle sits on and plays. And speaking of that there's a lost art form...album covers.
I loved albums. Any hippie worth his incense knows what an album cover was good for. ;)

Have a nice day.
uncle hippie

**You know I can't even say the word disco without my gums starting to bleed.

www.twiitter.com/chilichallis1
www.standupschool.com

Teaching Stand up Comedy and my Dojo!

In a few hours I will be graduating a new class of people that attended my 'comedy dojo' . I am gratified to say it is being touted as one of -if not THE best stand up comedy and humor writing classes/situations in the business.

I hold my regular 5 weeks classes in Ann Arbor at the Comedy Showcase. I try to do as many as I can there. It's a historic club dating back over 25 years and has resisted in the past having anybody hold a teaching situation there. I am proud that they chose me. I am proud of the way I present my coaching. In my dojo I offer live instruction and direction and even online writing help to all students who attend. You can check out the info at http://www.aacomedy.com/

I never started out to be a teacher it just happened. I began doing 'writer's camps' in the 80s and it evolved from that. There are many comedy classes around the country and some are helpful. I guess you could say any homework you do before you bounce onto a comedy stage is helpful. I would just warn all prospective students to choose your mentors wisely.

With me you get a former NBC Tonight Show writer and 25 year plus headlining comedian's assistance. That's hard to come by (actually damn near impossible) for new people to obtain in this business.
I also do an online class and that has allowed me to help others I couldn't have even dreamed of getting to in the past. http://www.standupschool.com/

I am always excited on nights that my students graduate and I'm nervous for them plenty lol. That's the one thing I can't help much with is when they are soloing on stage in front of a live audience. They have to take the fire for themselves. I know that I've prepared them and assured them and they're ready even to face the fear. (I deal with that in my classes) Fear is a huge thing to get over in many things of course and I coach ways to soothe that and help fight it in the 'dojo'.

Never let fear stop you. Fear has no power except for what you give it. Acknowledge that it exists make fun of fear and you will be fine.

To my students and all who read this may I say 'break a leg'!
Live it and give it!!

**You can't have everything...but you sure can hear about it!

**You can't buy everything...how would you get it home?

peace and have a nice day. :)

Uncle Hippie...chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1

Back to the Future

I put a lot into stand up comedy-my life. It's an old story but a true one that I started performing stand up in grad school in the 60's. I had a wonderful elementary teacher that saw a spark of talent in me and therefore allowed me at least an opportunity to do something every Friday in her class. I often chose stand up or some kind of comedy sketch. This continued into high school where I faked my way through many oral presentations using humor....often getting a A I might add.

I'm not sure what it is but I have always loved making people laugh. Not that I am a class clown type or 'always on' as they say I simply love the sound of people laughing. I guess I can say I need that. There's worse hangups I suppose.

I have seen the business of comedy shoot through the roof in the 80's and level off in the 90's where more and more agents and chain clubs were opened. Now in the 2000's the biz of laughter is kind of taken for granted...too much so if you ask me. We have far too many people in the business not because it was an obsession from their soul but because of inclination. True story, I had a college age guy opening for me once that actually told me he had a choice to tour with his comedy act or work at a fast food place for the summer and so he flipped a coin and the comedy won. Did it really???? I saw his act- comedy lost and so did the audiences that paid to see him.

True comedy artists are few and far inbetween now. Hell sometimes the mere mention of the word artist into this business in this era draws smurks from some. There are far too many under talented individuals masquerading as comedian artists and are giving 'performances' of smut and crap and hiding behind the manrtra of 'they're keeping it real'! lol Now THAT is funny.
Also in keeping with failures there are vulture like club owners and agents that book these 'comics' without a clue that they are driving business away. How many times are you going to put a bad product out there for your customers and expect them to continue to come back?! They often speak of how many 'butts in the seats' that they need to profit...and they actually can't seem to get they're running those 'butts' out of their venues regularly with substandard acts.

I'm the type of guy that looks for answers. Sometimes it starts personally. For me that meant that I work hard to keep a fresh act that is funny, immediate and perhaps even contains a message or two and gives my audience a feeling that coming to my show was a great way to spend their money.

Unfortunately I am only one comedian and so it's easy for some clubs and agents to bury me in the muck and continue on ruining a business without a inkling of how they're doing it or even caring if they do.

So what is the real answer? The power of change is in the hands of the fans of comedy -YOU.
As a fan and customer YOU have to speak up to the club owners and mgrs and agents. YOU can do more than put a bad critique on one of their cards they leave on the tables. Speak to the owners personally and voice your concerns. Most importantly lobby for the comedians you have seen and want them to return. We all have favoriters...stick up for them and call the venues and ask for your favorites by name and do it repeatedly. Walk out of shows you don't like. Don't sit there and take it. YOU are the buyer YOU have the power to help me and other comedians like me change this business back to an art form. Demand quality and you'll get it.

Here's a hippie thing to do. Let's protest!! Get in front of your comedy clubs and hold up signs that read 'Chili Challis now!!' 'We want Chili' !!!! Ok I guess that's too much, can't blame a guy huh? Seriously though if you're a fan of stand up comedy and want to see change don't write your congressman write your venue owner, email them, leave comments on their websites and for god sakes call them and get in their face. Let them know you're not just a 'butt in the seat' you are a patron of art. It's time for the art appreciators to take back an art form and demand higher quality. It's the American way.

I'll look for you at my shows. Fight a good fight.

Have a nice day.

Everybody's Uncle Hippie,
chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1

Hell Yell Tuesday!

It's Hell Yell Tuesday!!! What does that mean you ask?! Just a fun little thing I woke up once saying to myself and found it likeably contagious when I told other people about it. It's a battle cry of sorts- just a little mantra to get you through a Tuesday....a day that is glossed over sometimes I believe.

Monday blues, Wednesday hump day, Thursday is Friday eve, then TGIF and weekend.

Hell Yell is all about enthusiasm! There's nothing quite like somebody saying to you 'hell yell' you can do it- go for it!-whatever it may be. A Hell Yell is whoop of support by your fellow being.

Humans can help each other emotionally and Hell Yell is about that. ;)

So give somebody a Hell Yell today and definitely give one to yourself. You can do it Hell Yell you can!!!

Do me a favor send one to me too!!! Help me take this global please!

Have a nice day. Your Uncle Hippie.

chill

www.twitter.com/chilichallis1

Cats and Bon Jovi

Discovered my cat is a big Bon Jovi fan. He walked into my room where the TV was showing an appearance of Bon Jovi and he was riveted...you know as much as a cat CAN be riveted. I think the attention span of a cat is the only attention span that ranks behind that of a crack/meth head.
Anyway he's a big fan and so kudos to Bon Jovi. He (the cat) should show me as much consideration with his attentiveness. Not a chance.

**I was at my friend's house the other day and his cat was so ornery with me and so aloof I could have sworn he was my cat.

**My cat has a unique way of playing the game of fetch. You throw the ball and he goes to the litter box, then has a snack and some water, lays around for a short time while cleaning himself and then well I can't remember- I'm usually napping myself by then. Anyway somehow later that evening he ends up with the ball and all his well.

**My friends call my cat 'unner'. Because he's always unner the table, unner the couch, unner the bed, unner your feet...you get the idea.

**My cat is afraid of thunder and lightening. He always trys to hide under the bed during storms. That's a bit of a problem...because that's my hiding place during storms.

**I've learned so much from my rescued pals I'm beginning to wonder who rescued who. ;)

"I don't eat animals and they don't eat me!..." a song a long long time ago in a place far far away

Uncle Hippie...chill

What is up?

Been asked that question lately? What's up!!!? Light and self explanatory I guess. A brilliant greeting and opening for conversation all in two words. What's up!!!!!!??? Demands a response doesn't it? Even though I'll bet many times it's answered with ...aaaah nothing. Still an eminently powerful canned greeting carried over from the 90's. What's up??!!! Gotta love it.

Makes you wonder why this micro-inquest hasn't been around throughout history. What's up??!
I'm pretty sure it's not mentioned once in the Bible. I don't think Einstein said it a single time.
He was too busy figuring out what is up in a relative sense.

Ever have somebody use it that surprises you? Your 88 year old grandma or the priest, minister or rabbi lets go with a big -what's up???!!! It concerns me when my pyschic friend says it. It's customary for me to ask- don't you know?

Now that I think about it I'll bet it just may be impossible to get through one day without saying it or having it said to you. Wanna bet?

So here's my solution, since we can't change what people will ask we should come up with a new response. Here's an opportunity to use humor and conceivably get a laugh from the inquestor. ;)

Let's try a few and you take it from there ok?

What's up? A. Inflation and the price of gas -what else is new?!
(See you've now answered it and flipped the question back to the questioner/greeter). We're on to something!

What's up? A. (females) You mean besides my dress size?!
(Bam! Self deprecating humor is always funny and disarming. Now you've forced the 'what's up' person to compliment you by saying noooo you look great!...lol ah see how this is getting easier and the psychological counterattacks abound!)

What's up? A. (men) Everything but my man boobs!
(Zing! Pow! Zoink!)

Now you got it -go write some yourself. You KNOW you're going to get the question be prepared with a fun answer! It's entertaining, fun, expressive, it's Friday what the hell!!!

**They say a cat has 32 muscles in each ear. I was shocked when I heard this. The way my cat responds to my call I didn't even know he had ears!

Have a nice day :)
your uncle hippie chill

Check me out on www.myspace.com/chilichallis or www.twitter.com/chilichallis1
Facebook too!

Playing Favorites

Do you play favorites? Do you have a favorite food, color or favorite anything? I reallly don't. It's always an odd question to me when someone asks what is my favorite (blank). The truth is I like a lot of varience in my foods, colors and many effects.

I have written and performed stand up comedy for almost 30 years and many times I am asked who is my favorite comedian or type of comedian. My most honest answer is I don't have one. Steve Martin and Richard Pryor come closest to filling the role of favorite but I have to say I like Steven Wright, Jackie Mason kills me, Bill Hicks of course and yes even Carrot Top.

Comedy is comedy to me. I like some physical comedy, props make me laugh as well as the more ingenious pop culture and political stuff. Anybody funnier than Louis Black?!! He's hysterical on many topics. The first time I saw Pee Wee Herman I thought I was going to whiz in my pants!
Sharp, bold, brainy, clever comedy really gets me and in the experience I have cultivated that takes many forms.

So back to the playing favorites. My thought has been that if you are hard and fast on a favorite you're automatically dismissing too much. I want it all ;) I guess my favorite is in dissimilarity, multiformity, MIXED BAG lol I suppose. I love too many sorts of foods to have a fav. Too many colors and combinations. I don't want a hard and fast area of thought and tastes I want dimensions!
Viva La no limits! FREEDOM.

Here's a experiment you can do. (Hippies are crazy about experimenting you know)
Even when you can get a favorite anything of yours simply try something else. I know it's crazy but see if you don't find the exposure to difference exciting.

just some thoughts. peace
chill -uncle hippie

**I was doing my usual flexing in front of my mirror today and dang if I didn't hit the car in front of me.

You can follow me on Twitter if not already. www.twitter.com/chilichallis1